


Do You Ever Miss Felix?

by AshenCrystal



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Angst, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm very emotional, M/M, implied lolix, season 15 spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-08-19
Packaged: 2018-12-17 07:26:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11846778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshenCrystal/pseuds/AshenCrystal
Summary: Do you ever miss Felix?That question is a lot more damaging than most would think. Most people wouldn't normally miss someone who used you, but Locus isn't most people.





	Do You Ever Miss Felix?

**Author's Note:**

> I have a lot of feelings about Locus showing up in the newest season, and because Felix was my favorite character, Grif's question hurt me quite a lot. So I decided to briefly dive into how it must've felt for Locus, because how else am I going to cope? Enjoy!
> 
> Side note: This is my first RvB fic, so go easy on me. This was also semi inspired by a short comic from gongagavillages on tumblr, which you can find here: http://gongagavillages.tumblr.com/post/163167068134/he-wishes-he-didnt

_Do you ever miss Felix?_

A five worded question shouldn’t be so disastrous, so _agonizing_ and yet, it felt like everything came crashing down on him.

Felix.

Memories of soft touches, a sly grin and dangerous words. The way his partner used to look at him with a mischievous glint in his eyes, how words used to spill from his lips, telling him that Locus _needed_ him. Sometimes it felt like he did.

No.

Felix _lied._ It was what he did best. He shouldn’t have been surprised by his deceit. He’d learned how to spin a web of lies to pull you in, to _use_ you. But he couldn’t get the voice out of his head, no matter how hard he tried to distract himself with trying to return to his roots — the days of Siris, when they were the good guys. When he hadn’t made the mistake of trusting Felix. When he has someone to genuinely _care._ No matter how hard he tried, he still heard that damn charming tone echoing in his thoughts.

 _“You’re special, Locus. **We’re** special. It’s us against the world.”_

Words that had been spoken to him upon their acceptance of the Chorus assignment.

Chorus.

His mind flashed to the temple, standing above the rest, throwing the gun at his partner’s feet. The panic from Felix’s voice was like no other sound he had ever heard. It was unsettling, it made his blood run cold. He could still hear the grenade’s explosion, and the scream that followed with it. He could still feel the tugging at his chest as he had to watch his partner get blasted off the edge. He could still remember the last words Felix had spoken to him as if they had been said to him yesterday.

_“We’re **partners. Survivors.** We **need** each other.”_

The thoughts that ran through his head as he heard these words — had he made the right decision? No, he couldn’t start regretting anything now. Felix used him, he never cared about him. He was just a bodyguard, _an attack dog._ He wasn’t important. He wasn’t _special._ Just a way for Felix to have someone to hide behind. A shield. He was good at hiding behind shields. Behind _people._ He would throw someone to the wolves if it would save him.

But even so..... there was a feeling in him that he couldn’t describe. It wasn’t loneliness. It wasn’t regret. It was unexplainable, but it was _there._ It was something in him that longed to hear Felix’s voice again, see that roguish smirk ghost across his lips, feel even the _smallest_ touch from him.

 _“Do you ever miss Felix?”_

He wishes he didn’t.


End file.
